Thursday, August 20, 2009

Hi from Washington!


I just wanted to touch base with all you Mainers! I know I've been in Washington all summer, so you haven't been able to get in touch with me to ask hard questions about difficult subjects like health care reform, but please visit one of my local offices, where the staffers will gladly print you up my policy statement on that. Please don't ask them to answer questions about it. Well, you can ask, but don't expect an answer, as they are under orders not to discuss the topic. Actually, I'd prefer you stop asking about that subject at all. My staffers are getting tired of having to lie and pretend there is any sort of suggestion that I or other hardline Republicans have any sort of plan. I don't have to justify my position, and I don't even have to state it if I don't want to. I'm the Senator, not you. So there.

I have been keeping really busy pushing obscure bills that are actually giveaways to private industry and close friends of mine. And it takes a lot of time to hold meetings with so many health insurance, hospital, and PhRMA lobbyists. But I will be sure to touch base with you, my loyal constituents, as often as possible.

If you have a question, don't ask me. I'm too busy. Call my office in Washington, and my receptionist will tell you you're wrong. Or visit my local offices. But no matter what you do, don't ask me or any other Republican any hard questions!

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